Have you ever done something, even though that little voice inside was screaming NO!… NO!… STOP!… DON’T DO THIS! and you did it anyway?
… and as expected, the outcome was disastrous!!!
Well you are not alone!
I have made a whoppa of a mistake… and the worst part, was that I actually heard the voice and acknowledged it ….and thanked it …and went ahead anyway!!! I know, I know…
Where does wisdom live?
Mindfulness is about connecting with your inner intuition, where all your wisdom and insight live. I actually make it a regular practice to tune in to that inner peaceful place through mindful moments …and I’m usually pretty good at living my life in accordance with the internal compass. But not this time!
You see, my personal policy is only to work and do business with like- minded companies, those who show humanity in business. Only values- based organisations….but this I slipped!! I broke my own personal rule and I’m still paying the price.
So here I am confronting my error every day for the whole year, hoping that somehow through magic, or any force greater than me .. that something will change and people will be put before dollars. But NO! nothing yet and I fear I will be sadly disappointed.
The thing with mistakes, is that we all make them…and of course we are much wiser after the event.
Some people choose to hide their mistakes.
Some pretend it wasn’t their error.
Others argue till they are blue in the face, that you are wrong and this isn’t a mistake at all.
There is another way-
Befriend your mistake
If you sit with your mistake and look at it head on, noticing it’s sharp edges and fierce complexion, you will notice that right inside… in the deepest and darkest part of that error is a little light that twinkles… and as you look even closer…you find a golden nugget.
Message from you to YOU
This is you, your learning, your growth, the message from you to you that shows you who you are and what you stand for.
Rather than beating yourself up, and mulling over the error with a brilliant and busy array of thought after thought after thought… rather than exploring with mind all the facts of the matter, and spinning the story over and over to explore every little action and each step that led to how the mistake was made… who did what?… when?… and how you ended up here? we can choose to behave differently.
Self Compassion
Bringing compassion to bear on yourself is the hardest and sweetest gift you can bring.
Your humanity requires you to make mistakes, because that is your internal growth system. Through mistakes we calibrate our internal life compass and move forward knowing that it is set on values that connect us to life.
Our values bind our actions and beliefs to our-selves.
They are the interface between you and the world.
What a gift! Mistakes help you to fine tune your internal values compass and move forward in the world with strength and alignment.
But this is not possible without a huge dose of self-compassion. So stop beating yourself up about your error. Treat yourself kindly and with huge doses of care…just the way you treat someone you truly love.
There are plenty of self -compassion exercises, and if you need assistance seek out through a coach, counsellor or a good friend that can help you tap into gentleness… towards yourself.
For me, I have learnt to face my mistake and to listen and trust my inner radar in the future. Through the mindful moments there is wisdom.
In the mean time, I am pouring all my love and care into this company, and staying glued to my values. Though I don’t want to work with sharks, I am hoping that they will make one little, baby, tiny, incy- wincy change… and If I can influence that change, I will surely know that my work is worthwhile. After all, sharks are just big fish that are influenced by an ecosystem.
As for you, mistakes are your internal radars’ fine tuning mechanism. Own them, love them and learn from them… but don’t make the same mistake twice!
I have some great mindfulness and self-compassion exercises in my mindful self- leadership workshop. Stay tuned for the public course …Or message info@cultureofcare.com.au to ask about an internal workshop for your work team.
Always make new mistakes.